Raising Children without a Parenting Manual
Writer’s Workshop – Interview from the Heart
This post has been inspired by Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop
Prompt #1 – Interview with My Mom!
How has motherhood changed you?
Prompt #1 – Interview with My Mom!
How has motherhood changed you?
A lot, in a lot of different ways. When you’re single you figure that the choices you make only affect you. When you have kids, no matter what you do, you think first how it’s going to affect them and what are you teaching them by your own actions. It made me more grounded. At a time that I wanted to give up, and the only thing that kept me going was, what will I be teaching my children if I give up. So in a way having children saved me.
(What she’s talking about is: Retiring, losing the house she worked so hard to put over our heads through the direct efforts of my step-father, going through a divorce, and finding herself jobless, homeless, alone and with a rebellious teen who was determined to get himself in trouble while having to sell off what little she did have to raise the airfare for me to leave her and go off to college. Yup. Don’t feel sorry for us, God had better in store for us and we needed to shed some baggage first.
)
(What she’s talking about is: Retiring, losing the house she worked so hard to put over our heads through the direct efforts of my step-father, going through a divorce, and finding herself jobless, homeless, alone and with a rebellious teen who was determined to get himself in trouble while having to sell off what little she did have to raise the airfare for me to leave her and go off to college. Yup. Don’t feel sorry for us, God had better in store for us and we needed to shed some baggage first.
)Has the meaning of motherhood changed for you over the years?
No I took my responsibility seriously from day one. There were times I thought I bit off more than I could chew, but having made the decision I was committed to stick at it. It’s always meant for me, and I was determined to, put out “quality children”. No matter what it took!
(There! You heard it directly from the source! Q-U-A-L-I-T-Y children. What’s that? She didn’t say what quality? Whatever. QUALITY! Superior, even!)
(There! You heard it directly from the source! Q-U-A-L-I-T-Y children. What’s that? She didn’t say what quality? Whatever. QUALITY! Superior, even!)
What do you think it will mean for you in years to come?
I hope it gets even better. Because now I have grandchildren and get to do it all over again!
How is being a grandmother different from being a mother?
Oh! First of all you’re so much wiser! Laughs. You get a chance to make more informed choices. You just are better as a grandmother than you were as a mother. It’s a reward. It’s wonderful. The only thing is that you feel that you know so much more, and you want to make some better wiser parenting decisions, and you forget they HAVE parents. You have learned the lessons, but you’re limited as to what you can do. You can’t re-take the tests.
Which do you prefer?
I think being a grandmother is easier, but you can’t become a good grandmother without going through the experience of being a mother! I was a single mother without any support, it really is very different.
What ages were your favorites?
Thinks for a long time. I would say a daughter at 35 is really great.
(Pffff. What 35? I am and will remain 30 until or unless I decide to change that. Wink wink.)
(Pffff. What 35? I am and will remain 30 until or unless I decide to change that. Wink wink.)
Do you miss having having kids in the house?
I miss not being close to my grandkids and having them around, but I’m not sure I could handle the noise! I’m too old for it. Laughs. But I’d love for them to be around. To hear them talk. To hear them as they grow and mature. It’s both.
(She lives in the US but I’m back in Trinidad now. I wanted to raise my kids with a little bit of the childhood that I had. We love Skype!)
(She lives in the US but I’m back in Trinidad now. I wanted to raise my kids with a little bit of the childhood that I had. We love Skype!)
What was the most difficult part of being a mom for you?
When they wanted freedom but I still wanted to protect them, because I knew what was out there. It was hard because I just didn’t want the children to be hurt. Because when they hurt, I hurt. And having been hurt myself, I just wanted to spare them that. You wish you could guide them through, but you can’t. And you feel pretty helpless. That’s the toughest time.
Of course I didn’t make it much easier, being the carefree spirit I am and determined not to be bound by anyone else’s fears. Had lots of adventures and made amazing friends, and never thought twice about it. Until I had my own kids! Lol. You know… when I suddenly looked at myself in the mirror and saw her!
Of course I didn’t make it much easier, being the carefree spirit I am and determined not to be bound by anyone else’s fears. Had lots of adventures and made amazing friends, and never thought twice about it. Until I had my own kids! Lol. You know… when I suddenly looked at myself in the mirror and saw her!
What was the most rewarding part?
Just to see my children happy. Just to see them mature and sound and happy.
(Note to brother. I love you dude, but grow up and call your mother. Seriously. Just say Hi.)
(Note to brother. I love you dude, but grow up and call your mother. Seriously. Just say Hi.)
Anything you want to add?
(Thinks.) Motherhood is draining. It tries you physically, emotionally, psychologically. It touches every emotional fibre in your body but… yeh… but it’s worth it.
And there we have it. The interview with the Inspiration for this blog, and my daily sounding board.
And there we have it. The interview with the Inspiration for this blog, and my daily sounding board.
Cheers Mom!
Now it’s your turn!
Choose a prompt, post it on your blog, and head over to Mama Kat’s and sign Mr. Linky. Be sure to sign up with the actual post URL and not just your basic blog URL (click on the title of your post for that URL). For good comment karma try to comment on the three blogs above your name!!
The Prompts:
1.) Interview you mom…questions might include, How has motherhood changed you? What ages were your favorites? Do you miss having having kids in the house? What was the most difficult part of being a mom for you? What was the most rewarding part? etc… I think I’ll ask my Mom if I’m her favorite child and when she dodges the question (again) I’ll scream, “DAMMIT WOMAN! Answer the QUESTION!!” Feel free to steal my idea.
2.) Tell us the story of your birth.
3.) How did you parents choose your name? What does it mean? What would you change your name to if you could?
4.) Describe a moment when you realized your mom was more than just a mom.
5.) Write a poem for your Mama.
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About Me
A 30-ish mother of 3 and unintentional entrepreneur, I started my own IT Consultancy firm after layoffs at my old job. I balance the world of Corporate IT with my life as Manager of the education, health and well-being of my children.
Blogging from the Caribbean, I give tech advice to moms and write about raising 3 kids under 10, one of whom has been diagnosed with Aspergers.